A rantbox

Things You Don't Want To Hear From Technical Support

  • "Do you have a sledgehammer or a brick handy?"
  • "That's right, not even McGyver could fix it."
  • "So -- what are you wearing?"
  • "Duuuuuude! Bummer!"
  • "Looks like you're gonna need some new dilithium crystals, Cap'n."
  • "Press 1 for Support. Press 2 if you're with 60 Minutes. Press 3 if you're with the FTC."
  • "We can fix this, but you're gonna need a butter knife, a roll of duct tape, and a car battery."
  • "In layman's terms, we call that the Hindenburg Effect."
  • "Hold on a second... Mom! Timmy's hitting me!"
  • "Okay, turn to page 523 in your copy of Dianetics."
  • "Please hold for Mr. Gates' attorney."


Also check the software development cycle. This one is too true... [yeah, that's experience talking]